Recorded by: Buddy Wasisname and the Other Fellers
Written by: Wayne Chaulk


God bless my soul what can I do they say my salt beef dinner is a killer
It’s got carcinogens and heavy duty fats it could serve as an elephant filler.
I’m as good as dead but I’m sure well fed ’cause I love those buckets of riblets
I love to drink that liquor and chew those bones even though I’m picking my giblets

Put on the beef, peas pudding and the greens
Carrots and turnips, can’t you smell that steam
Some new potatoes with a puddin’ good and lumpy
No I just can’t wait, I’m a salt beef junkie.

Now some folks like to eat carrot sticks ’cause they’re afraid they might become gluttons,
But me I don’t like those rabbit foods ’cause I’m afraid that I might pass buttons
Every Sunday morning while some folks fast or eat food that tastes real crappy
I got my salt beef dinner cooking on the stove ’cause I wanna die real happy.

Jane Fonda likes to eat sesame seeds and Twiggy likes low fat tofu
But they don’t live in Newfoundland where the winter winds blow right through you
Now if they lived in Wesleyville where the north wind blows right vicious
They’d enjoy their salt beef dinners just like me and the missus

I don’t want to be some health food freak who eats alfalfa and bean sprouts
I don’t want to live to a hundred and three if I got to throw my beef out
When it comes right down to preparing food I don’t want to germinate or shuck it
I’ll take my chances on salt beef dinners and keep my head in this bucket.